The Mentor

Dr. Javier's office, William Shaw 3rd floor. It is the group's nth thesis consultation. 

GEMMA: Hi Dr. Javier! 

MIA: Have you gotten a look at our Chapter 3 na? How is it?

DR. J: Ay nako, I didn't get to finish kasi I don't understand this part...[Goes into a long litany of critiques about a particular section] Who wrote this part ba??

[Charles, who has been silent the whole time, raises his hand sheepishly]

DR. J: Ah. [A look of concern softens her features] Well you know, you did well naman eh. You can write well when you put your mind to it...[Gently explains what needs to be fixed]

Coffee Bean Guy

Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf, Alabang Town Center. Mid-afternoon, the mall is packed. There's a free concert at the activity center. Enter Mia, Kat and Alex. 

MIA: Short Cafe Mocha please.

COFFEE BEAN GUY: Name?

MIA: Uhh...Toni. 

CBG: Short Mocha for TONIE [that's how he spells it on the cup]. Would that be all Tonie?

MIA: Mhmm... [fans herself]

CBG: Maybe you'd like to avail of our discount card?

MIA: Sorry?

CBG: Oh...'Cause I was trained in Greenbelt...there's no discount card here, just in Greenbelt.

[Awkward pause]

MIA: Umm...sige next time nalang. 

[takes the receipt and walks away]

Artist Date: VOTE Shirt

This week, I treated my IA to a bit of shopping - but I didn't want to just spend my money. I wanted to spend it on something meaningful and useful. I ended up purchasing a yellow t-shirt at Bayo with the word VOTE on it. My IA should be of legal age by now, so I've been taking time to educate her on national issues. I've been reading the newspaper more often now. Or at least the headlines, which is the only thing I have time to read. I'm also updated through online articles that I find on friends' Facebook pages and on the pages of various Causes I'm part of. The shirt is not just a shirt - it's part of my IA's voter's education. 

I would be happier if only I expressed my feelings more. I don't really know why, but throughout my adolescent life I've mastered the art of concealing my feelings. I'm a really bad liar, so I'm not talking about being untruthful. It's just that when I have something to say against a person, more often than not I just keep it to myself. I guess I found when I was much younger that I got into less fights and less trouble with my parents if I just shut up and nodded my heads. Now I can't get rid of the habit. When I'm being scolded by anyone in authority, I just grit my teeth and nod. I try to put on my best "remorseful" face (which my mom still sees as frowning...but then again she's the only one who's ever been good at seeing through my most ambiguous expressions). But secretly, I'm just zoning out so I don't really process what they're saying. And I do get into less trouble than my sister, who can never back out of an argument. But afterwards, I replay the scene in my head, rehearsing lines I should have said if I had the guts. 

Finding Him

My parents don't know this, but I really don't enjoy going to Mass. The only reason I go is to be with them and my Lola. I'm not an atheist or anything; in fact I feel very strongly that there is a God. But I just can't find him in mass. When I hear the priest talking, I don't hear God telling me how to be a better human being. Most of the time, they just talk about what they think the Gospel means. But I find it increasingly more difficult to believe that it's the voice of God working through the Holy Spirit, etcetera. Sometimes I feel I have a better chance of finding Him in the mall or in school. 

Girly Clubbing

I have always wanted to go to a girly bar or strip club. You know how taboos are much more tempting than what is permitted? I suppose that's why. I've always wondered what exactly goes on in those places. I've also wondered what kind of girls work there. I guess I have a perverse admiration for girls who can show off their bodies in public. I know I would never be able to do that. As of now, this is still something I have yet to cross off my bucket list. 

Beauty Queen Dreams

When I was a child, I wished I could join a beauty pageant. I knew I could do way better than the other contestants I saw on TV in the question and answer portion. For my talent, I would dance ballet while singing. I used to think I sang well. I know better now. I wanted to walk down the stairs in a long glamorous gown and have the whole world see me smile. Now I know that I don't need to be a beauty queen for people to appreciate my talents, intelligence and physical appearance. 

My Earliest Memory

In my earliest memory, I was in a stroller. It was green. There were plastic toys hanging in front of me. My sister, older by a year, was pushing it but I remember feeling the presence of someone older watching over both of us. Years later, I would question this memory. I realized one day that there is a framed picture of me in a green stroller, with my sister holding the handle. We were both looking at the camera. I don't know now if I really kept that memory or if my imagination supplied the scene based on the photo. 

Summer

On a summer afternoon, I like to spend the whole day cleaning my room. I am not a sentimental person. I throw out practically everything that won't have any future use. I hate having to make scrapbooks and I rarely keep letters and photos in hard copy. I have only one drawer full of random things I've decided to keep over the years. This includes mementos from my prom. That's probably the only event I'm sentimental about because it started a whole chain of significant events in my life. I still have my corsage, notes from my date, photos, the invitation. I stuffed it all in between the pages of a scrapbook in some semblance of being organized and creative.